The Invisible Web

Your Trip Into the Chapel Perilous

Results and Video Teasers from ISW Hot Summer RUB-DOWN 06/29

Posted by invizweb on July 4, 2008

Catastrophes and Miracles

It was a day (and a night) of catastrophes and miracles for Inter-Species Wrestling and its owner Mike Rotch. The biggest catastrophe being that the ring truck broke down and the ring didn’t show up to Foufounes Electriques until after Hot Summer RUB-DOWN was scheduled to end. The biggest miracle? That the show happened at all.

The catastrophes started with a tire blowing out on the ring truck. Tire no sooner fixed than the truck’s starter blew. The replacement truck never showed up and the ring truck in fits and starts took half a day to complete a one-hour trip.

The owner of Foufounes Electriques was relatively pleased to have over a hundred wrestling fans drinking for close to three hours patiently waiting in the downstairs bar for the ring to show up, somewhat less so when a brawl broke out between the BADD Brothers and El Hijo del BAMBOO! He finally lost his patience when no sooner had the BADD/BAMBOO! Bar Brawl been broken up, than a street fight between Stinky the Homeless Guy and Gore the Zombie Master broke out.

You-Tube Teaser:

With Giant Tiger threatening to get naked to the roars of the wrestling fans, the owner of Foufs told Rotchy that he would have to either open the upstairs stage and put on the show by 10pm and put on the show or bite the bullet and cancel the show. Rotchy opened the doors, crossed his fingers, knocked on wood… and the ring truck finally wheezed up to the back door five minutes later.

With every member of the crew relaying ring parts up the stairs and the crowd cheering every strut and beam, the ring was put together in under a half-hour and the show started at 10:30 p.m. about when we were expecting to end the show…

Once the catastrophes ended, the miracles began…


Inter-Species Wrestling Press Release:

Michael “Llakor” Ryan
Inter-Species Wrestling

Hot Summer RUB-DOWN
Results Quick and Dirty

Sunday, June 29th, 2008
Foufounes Electriques,
Montreal, Quebec, CANADA

Giant Tiger Presents: Beef Wellington vs. A Bear
A Bear forces Beef to tap to the Bear-Hug after 7:01

ISW Multi-Verse Title Match: Player Uno ISW Champion vs. Kevin Steen
Player Uno won by DQ after 10:17 when Kevin Steen attacked the ref,

Three-Way Dance: Stinky the Homeless Guy vs. Michael Von Payton vs. El Hijo del BAMBOO!
M.V.P. pinned El Hijo del BAMBOO! in 4:59 after a second-rope leg sweep.

The BADD Match: The BADD Brothers (Chad and Brad BADD) accompanied by Dad BADD in an Invitational Gauntlet…
defeated F**k-Face and Bruiser at 0:10
defeated the Priests at 2:22
defeated T-Unit (Big Larry and Dolla-Bill) in 6:34

Barnyard Brawl: Flip D. Berger vs. Moohammad, the Terrorist Cow
FANS BRING THE LEGO Match – Winner Kills, Cooks and Eats the Loser
Moohammad beat Flip with two Cow Stomps into Lego after 14:21

Teacher and Student vs. Zombie and Zombie: El Generico and Twiggy vs. Izzy Deadyet and Zombiefied
El Generico pinned Zombiefied at 18:53.

Hot Summer RUB-DOWN
Detailed Results

The show started two and a half hours late and the first two miracles was that the majority of the crowd stayed for the show and that a heavily liquored Giant Tiger () was still able to fulfill his duties as Special Guest Referee for the match where he got to choose Beef’s opponent. Accompanied to the ring by a heavily muscled friend that he introduced as “One of the League of Extra-Ordinary Gentlemen, Oily Norman”, Giant Tiger explained that Norman was “not Beef’s opponent. He is just here to oil himself up sensually for my amusement. Beef’s opponent is A Bear!”

A Bear would of course be Beef’s opponent from the IWS Fifth Anniversary show V, later Beef’s tag partner in the 2005 CHIKARA Tag World Grand Prix as part of the team B. J. Wellington and the A Bear. A Bear later turned on Beef at ISW Slamtasia

Some Special Guest Referee’s go through the motions of impartiality, not Giant Tiger. From the opening bell, a (more than usually) drunk-out-of-his-mind Giant Tiger refused to even do a slow count in Beef’s favour not even after Beef hit A Bear with the finishing move known to be A Bear Kryptonite: The Stone Cold Stunner. In the end, with Beef Wellington trapped in A Bear-Hug, Giant Tiger raised Beef’s hand three times and slammed his arm down three times before declaring A Bear the winner by submission.

After the match, A Bear refused to let Beef play dead, worrying the talented Tasseled Titan’s torso like a world champion apple bobber. Eventually, Giant Tiger felt forced to intervene, drop kicking A Bear out of the ring and offering Beef his hand, angrily shouting, “I hate you, but I fuckin’ respect you!!!”

To thank the fans for their patience, I was in the process of handing out free ISW DVDs when Kevin Steen interrupted, dragging Player Uno to the ring by his mask, stealing the microphone from me, throwing me out of the ring, breaking a dozen DVDs over Uno’s head and declaring that he wanted his title shot right away because, “Owen Steen’s babysitter charges double after midnight!” Despite having been ambushed by Steen, Uno put up a valiant defence of his title. Steen’s frustration at not being able to score a quick pin-fall boiled over – leading him to attack referee Yan causing ISW senior official Bakais to DQ Steen, saving Uno’s title.

You-Tube Teaser:

Despite cooperation between Stinky and BAMBOO! Jr., and much to the crowd’s displeasure, the hated Michael Von Payton was able to continue his ISW winning streak by pinning El Hijo del BAMBOO!

In their BADD Match Invitational Gauntlet, Chad and Brad BADD along with their father, Dad BADD, destroyed all comers, including the team of F**k-Face and the Bruiser, two priests who wandered into the ring, the hip=hop group of T-Unit and their entire entourage and our full ring crew.

(I only escaped by hiding in the crowd.)

Flip D. Berger started the Barnyard Brawl by throwing free hamburgers out to the crowd, saving three special burgers that he announced were Moohammad’s brother, sister and mother. An incensed Moohammad attacked out of the crowd gaining the early advantage. ISW fans had been invited to bring Lego to be used during the match and this led to a number of sick spots including a Fisherman’s Buster into the Lego. In the end, Moohammad prevailed thanks to the intervention of his surviving brother, Moooooostafa. One sick Fisherman’s Buster into Lego later and according to the stipulation, Moohammad has the right to kill, cook and eat Flip D. Berger.

You-Tube Teaser:

The main event was a barn burning, kick-ass, ass kicking, old school as fuck, tag-team fun. One fan at ringside called it “The Match of the Decade”, while another commented that the Walking Dead team reminded him of classic AWA heels.

(Of course, given that Izzy Deadyet and Zombiefied are, well, DEAD, for all I know, they are classic AWA heels.

Despite the best efforts of Gore the Zombie Master and his two-man army of walking dead, Twiggy and El Generico emerged victorious, hitting Zombiefied with a BRAIIINBUSTTTAAAAH! Followed by a Twiggy Swanton for the pin.

After the match, Gore and Izzy Deadyet attacked Zombiefied, giving him three Tombstone Pile Drivers.

The DVD of Hot Summer RUB-DOWN is available now from and will be available very soon from

The IWS presents: Summer Slaughter, Saturday, July 19th, 2008 at Bogey’s World Bar & Billiard, 3250 Cremazie Est (corner of Cremazie and St-Michel near the St-Michel metro), Montreal, Quebec, CANADA. Doors open at 7:30 pm, show starts at 9:00 pm, tickets are $20 for VIP, $15 for Regular. 18+, card and times subject to change. For more information go to or e-mail .

The IWS presents: Hardcore Heat, Saturday, August 23rd, 2008 at Bogey’s World Bar & Billiard, 3250 Cremazie Est (corner of Cremazie and St-Michel near the St-Michel metro), Montreal, Quebec, CANADA. Doors open at 7:30 pm, show starts at 9:00 pm, tickets are $20 for VIP, $15 for Regular. 18+, card and times subject to change. For more information go to or e-mail .

The IWS proudly presents: Un F’N Sanctioned, Main Event is FANS BRING THE WEAPONS! Saturday, September 27th, at the beautiful, downtown Medley, 1170 St-Denis, near the Berri-UQAM Metro. Montreal, Quebec, CANADA. Doors open at 7:30 PM, show starts at 9 PM. VIP tickets are $25, Regular tickets are $20. VIP ticket holders admitted first. No reserved seating. Tickets can be purchased online at or in person at the Medley box office. 18+. Card and times subject to change. For more information go to or e-mail .


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